Recently, a friend and I were having a conversation about the appropriate age for children to sit and attend at mass without the need for additional activities (i.e books, coloring, etc).
My answer, everyone is different. Any parent can attest to this. Think of your children. Do each of them learn the same way? Do they all have the same strengths and weaknesses? What about athletic ability? Did they all walk at the same age? Talk at the same age? It still amazes me to look at all three of my boys and see how uniquely different each of them are.
The conversation stemmed from me telling her how helpful it was to have the mini rosary pop-its with us at mass on Christmas Eve. My 8 and 6 year old sat quietly and fidgeted with their rosary. The movement of their hands was just enough movement to keep their brain and bodies satisfied for awhile. You know how it is on Christmas. Get to mass early enough so you can actually sit down. An extra half hour is not an easy task with three young boys. Let’s face it. Kids need to move around. Developmentally, they are not made to sit still for long periods of time. That’s why good teachers give their students breaks to move around. They know their students need it.
I am not saying don’t set the expectation high for your children’s behavior at mass. On the contrary. Set the bar high, let your children know what you expect from them. Sit up close so they can see what’s going on. If they read, teach them how to follow along in the missalette. But be realistic too. If you can hand them a quiet age appropriate toy that will help them stay quiet and attend a little longer, why not? Adults pray the rosary all the time during mass. Let your child learn to do the same thing but using something a little more fun and engaging for them.